Miscarriages

It always starts with the Talk to Ginny video call booking where women and their partners can book a complimentary 30 minutes call with me to find out more about their birthing options in Singapore. It was an ex-client who attended antenatal classes 7 years ago for the birth of her first child, and even though the birth did not turn out the way she hoped, they both found the antenatal classes extremely valuable in empowering them to make better decisions and helped them to navigate the birthing system in Singapore.

This time around they proactively changed their choice of Obstetrician and were enquiring about engaging doula services to have a better birthing experience this time around. Given the gap in child spacing, I knew that there were stories left untold and found out that she had 2 miscarriages in-between the first and this pregnancy, one of which was a partial molar pregnancy which hadn’t been picked up by her Obgyn. It was only when her husband admitted her to KK Hospital for excessive blood loss did they discover it. A life nearly lost.

That was when I opened a can of worms. As she broke down in sobs, untold stories of how the past two miscarriages were handled with lack of good care and compassionate emerged. Despite seeing a ‘popular’ Obgyn, she is still not getting the reassurances she is needing to know that her current pregnancy is tracking well.

Nothing’s changed when I take the time to offer this complimentary calls for mothers-to-be wanting to know their options - the context of the stories may vary from one to another, a total stranger breaking down in my presence either in relief that someone finally understands or emphasizes, a safe moment they may have stumbled unto… I’ve changed. Having now experienced two miscarriages myself, I know what it feels like or more so, I know the ‘missing’ feeling, the emptiness within waiting to be filled, and the reassurances needed when finally pregnant again.