The Blossom of Our Love - Kaiera Grace Kaixin Begent-Chia

Beanie, as we have been calling our little darling since the day we had our first ultrasound scan, because she, at 7.5 weeks, looked like a jellybean, was born on 14 December 2004 at 5.14pm, in Room 6 of Thomson Medical Centre. Her birth was a miracle, one that cannot be done without God, one that might possibly be filled with discouragement without Tim and Ginny.

I can't remember the exact time that each significant event happened during the labour and during Beanie's birth. But each step towards her birth was like a graduation, a triumph, a battle won!

At Week 36, who would have known Beanie would be born on that day. I mean, her EDD was supposed to be 4 weeks later on 08 January 2005. Moreover, Beanie was still in the upright position despite our two-week long effort in trying all sorts of positions and methods to turn her, including moxa sticks and tilting the bed. She hasn't turned. In fact, I was supposed to do a ECV when I visit Dr Paul Tseng at my next appointment if Beanie still hadn't turned by then. (Funny thing was that Dr Tseng did tell us that he would be on vacation during these two weeks, but we didn't think it was a problem at all as our EDD was supposed to be after he came back from his vacation!)

I woke up at about 3am or so, with the urge to pee. While I was about to get out of bed to go to the loo, without even making it half way down the bed, whoosh, the waters just came whooshing out. I got a shock - wondered how come I'm suffering from incontinence and wondered if it is one of the side effects of being pregnant! Then it dawned on me that it could be that my waterbag that has burst. I woke Tim up, telling him urgently that my waterbag has burst, what to do now? Tim is ever so calm, so composed, even in the middle of the night. Amazing trait, that is. He looked at the wet bed, confirmed that it was definitely the waterbag, and took many towels and laid them on the bed for me to lie on. Then a thought crossed my mind again - Ginny suggested before that we put plastic sheets on the bed so when waterbag burst it wouldn't wet the bed. You know, I was intending to do just that possibly one or two weeks before EDD. Who knows the waterbag has to burst 4 weeks before, so no chance.

At this time, I was also very concerned for Beanie's wellbeing. Was she still alive? There's no more water to cushion her, will she be comfy? I kept asking Tim to feel my tummy, while I constantly try to concentrate to feel her movements. I remember reading somewhere that once the waterbag burst, the baby has to be born soon because he/she might not have enough oxygen in the womb now. But Ginny assured that it was a myth and that the water replaces itself constantly, though not a large amount. It will still be enough to last Beanie till the time she was to come out.

Tim sms Ginny to inform her, but it was like wee hours of the morning, so we didn't expect any reply from her. Anyway I didn't feel any contraction at that point. So we thought better get some rest, and I fell back to sleep. During the next few hours though, the waters kept coming on and off. Finally at about 5+am I thought I felt a contraction. I couldn't be certain whether it was though.

At 8+am, Tim was in correspondence with Ginny about the possibility of Dr Tseng's replacement doctor allowing me to go on as natural a birth as I would like, not just drug-free, but also definitely not a C-Section, even with Beanie in the breech position. Ginny was highly doubtful that the replacement doc would want to do that, although we insisted on it, or had any experience with it. At about 9am, she resourcefully managed to get Dr Lai Fon Min for us, which is one of the best things that ever happened.

We packed our hospital bag, and I even had the time to think about what sort of clothes I want to wear to welcome Beanie into this world. hehe.... Then off we went in the taxi to Camden to meet Ginny and consult Dr Lai. He is one of the few doctors, I think, that has done a breech vaginal birth, but with epidural to control the timing of the pushing and forceps and episiotomy to guide the head; neither of which we wanted.

When we reached there, Dr Lai was very nice and calm, like Ginny and like Tim. I believe that the calm composure of these three important people was the major contribution to my initial calm attitude to this whole experience. Dr Lai did a ultrasound and Beanie was still breech.

The contractions at this point was getting stronger, but I was still in my conscious mind. Dr Lai did a heart monitoring thing on Beanie and I laid in a room at his Camden clinic (which felt totally like a spa environment) for half an hour. Ginny left us for about 15 mins while Tim and I considered whether we wanted epidural, episiotomy and forceps during the labour, as strongly recommended by Dr Lai. Dr Lai wanted epidural administered to me because for a breech vaginal birth, the urge to push is premature, which is very true. But on consideration, we decided to go drug-free, sticking to our original plan.

We went home about 12 noon, made the necessary phonecalls to work to settle some work matters, and then had lunch. The contractions were getting more intense but still bearable. Had a yummy lunch to make sure I would have the energy to cope with the strength I would need later. As there wasn't much to do as we already had the hospital bag packed, I just sat on the couch and waited.

The contractions were getting more and more intense and frequent. Tim sms for Ginny to come over and we waited around. By the time she arrived, I was lying in bed with pain. I couldn't even greet her. The contractions increased rather rapidly from now, compared to just a couple of hours ago when it was still bearable. I slipped into lala land very quickly from then. Ginny's massage was magical. It eased the pain immediately. Ginny rubbed my back and told me everything is okay. I fell asleep a few times for a few seconds and really appreciated those moments when there were no contraction.

I don't know how long it was before I finally felt I couldn't control the urge to push. I told Tim and Ginny that I needed to push. Immediately Ginny said to Tim that it's time to go to the hospital. So off we went when the taxi arrived. On the way out to the door, I had to hold on to Ginny several times for support when the contractions came. When I finally made it into the taxi, the urge was very very strong.

Ginny kept telling me to do the kneeling position so the urge to push wouldn't be so strong. I controlled and controlled. It was very difficult. But I knew I had to do it - for Beanie's sake! That kept me going. I kept praying to God for strength to control. Each turn, each bump in the taxi acted like a stimulus for me to push. It was unbearable. But I kept holding onto Tim, kneeling down.

Finally, I saw TMC round the corner. Got wheeled to the delivery ward. So embarassing with so many strangers around! But I was in too deep a concentration to try not to push, I didn't care what others think then.

When I finally made it to Room 6, I had to crawl onto the bed and went into the kneeling position again. I kept asking why the doctor wasn't here yet, I had to push now. I even asked for epidural, for painkillers! I'm glad Ginny and Tim were there to encourage me, or else I think I would have succumb to the seduction of the drug by then.

It seemed like eternity, but finally I heard Ginny said that Dr Lai was here. And somehow a few mins later, I heard the good news - "You can push now!" Honestly I don't know who said that, but I think it was Ginny who announced the good news. I chose the birth stool and pushed with all my might. This pushing process seemed to go on for ages too.

There were several times I fell asleep during pushing, between the contractions. Though for a few seconds, the sleep felt really revitalising. Ginny's offer of water was also a life-saver. Dr Lai sat on a little stool in front of me and waited, while monitoring Beanie's heartbeat at intervals, as we did not wish for constant monitoring. I remembered that at some point when I was heeding the nurse's and Ginny's advice to push harder and hold the push longer, I wanted to grab hold of Dr Lai who was sitting in front of me, just for strength. Poor Tim, at this time, he was grabbing and holding me up from behind with all his might on the birthing stool. I was totally exhuasted. I'm sure he was too, but he still had to keep going to support me, or else I would just fall.

Finally someone said "The leg is out!". I transferred to the birthing chair, because my legs were too tired to hold any longer. I felt Beanie's leg dangling while I moved from the stool to the chair. Okay, finally part of Beanie was out. In my heart, I knew I had to keep going and at this point it was too late to give up, or else Beanie would be stucked like that forever. Then someone said "The shoulders out, only the head left, Cindy!" I thought, okay this is the crucial part, quick! I can't remember how long, but a few pushes later, a slimy little Beanie was lying on my chest! Suddenly all the pain was gone!

The placenta came out shortly after, and the paediatrician examined Beanie after the cord was cut.  All these time, I was busy looking at the beautiful Beanie in my arms. Poor little baby had a bruised left leg because that leg was the one that came out first before the rest of the body.

But there you go, Kaiera Grace Kaixin Begent-Chia was born to Tim and Cindy on this day, adding more rainbows, sunshine and laughter to our lives. Our blossom of love!

All in all, despite all the hoohahs about breech vaginal birth, when I was actually in labour, I didn't think about it as a breech vaginal birth. I just did what I could, what we think is the best, for her, for me, to give birth to Kaiera. That was all.

It was definitely important to be well-informed and take the time and effort to learn of the pros and cons of the type of birth, of the different options I have/had. Or else we might not have been as determined to go by this path we had chosen, as it seems to be a very controversial path to take. It worked for us and did me and Kaiera a huge amount of good - she was such an amazingly alert baby, suffering no drowsy side effects of using drugs and I was also alert and awake to greet my baby. So really, the decision cannot be that controversial after all.